Thursday, 28 February 2013

Because Fuck You, That's Why.

You see this picture? Until 11pm tonight this hideous contraption is about to give me hell.


Yeah. Thank God I'm Fucked.

If you don't know what this is, or have never had to be on the receiving end of one, you have never truly resented working on a Friday.

We don't have TGIF. We have things like...

TGIO- ThankGodIt'sOver.
TGID- ThankGodI'mDrunk.
TGIDGASLICT- ThankGodIDidn'tGetASingleLactoseIntollerantCuntTonight

or in front of house's case- TGNAMFIITR -ThankGodNobodyAskedMeForIceInTheirRiesling.

So to everyone out there with your precious little "Oh Em Gee so excited it's the weekend!" posts.


Go eat a laxative and a stool hardener and have your insides fight to the death.


  1. I'm about to graduate my apprenticeship and I just found this blog... I about DIED laughing reading this...

    So tru... So tru...

    1. Cheers mate that means a lot. Stay tuned.

  2. I hate ticket machines; I always have. I get nervous and uncomfortable at the supermarket checkouts and other retail purchase points.
    Now things are much worse. I work at an über busy tapas restaurant and each dish has its own ticket. It's not unusual to have 6 feet of dockets hanging out of the machine. It makes me shit my pants and twists my guts all at the same time. So uncomfortable.