Sunday 24 February 2013

Excuse Me While I Smash Into Your Face.

Went to the beach with the boy yesterday.

Amazing weather, cool water and a perfect 10 sunbaking naked in front of us.

I'm not going to lie, I was looking more than anybody else on the beach. Thank fuck for sunglasses, protection from the glare that allows me a more subtle stare at this girl's BEYOND amazing goddess-like physique. I even rang one of my mates who has been on the hunt for a 10 for a few years now JUST to gloat.

But that aside, I got a little tipsy in the heat. Le boy has a couple of mates join us around 3.

I run out of the water (nearly attractively face plant) and do the whole "Hey guys -mwa- great to see you."

Except... it's hot, I'm a little drunk from a whopping 4 beers (lightweight) and wobbly with dehydration AND blind in one eye, so safe to say my depth perception is not exactly amazing.

My 'mwa' turned into one of those Smash The Other Person's Face type cheek kisses.

Not really a way to recover from one of them except to overcompensate with the next mate by barely feather brushing his cheek.

Safe to say I probably should apologise (sorry lads).

But then again, maybe I was just feeling a little violent that the 10 left just as they arrived.

Hey, don't get between a fat kid and it's cake... Just sayin'.

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