Cheeky Fucking Cunt.

So the 'bad review' we got?

Turns out if was written by a chef from a neighbouring restaurant. The swiney asswipe of a cunt disliked all 22 North Melbourne restaurants that day except strangely for one ...

His own.

You are a pathetic piece of horse shit... Actually, I take that back. Horse shit has a use.

If your dick was on fire and I had a bucket of water I'd grab a crazy straw and drink it in front of you.

You are single handedly the proof that God exists and has a sense of humour.

I mean, I work hard, I love my restaurant and I was genuinely upset about this review. Distraught even, verging on psychotic and ready to take up alcoholism as a new hobby (clearly a stable-minded person right here...)

I don't understand what would drive somebody to do that. Did your imaginary friend hate you as a child? Did your mother slap you and get shit stains on her hand?

In the words of Moe Syzlak:  "Blah! Choking on my own rage here."